September 26, 1999

Power Rankings: On what criteria did you based your Power Rankings?
Chris Carman: I based the Power Rankings this time on pure numbers.
PR: So we won't find the Spirit number one and say, the Lizards, number 24?
CC: There is no personal bias here. Teams were evaluated based on their wins, losses, goals for, goals against, goal differential, and last 10 games performances.
PR: Wow, that's a mouthful. Was there anything special that personalizes these rankings for Chris Carman?
CC: Depending on how you ranked against the rest of the league in those categories, you were awarded Carman points. The teams were ranked in order of these points.
PR: Carman points? Is that like Air Miles?

Missed a previous issue of the Power Rankings? Tant pis mon ami. That's French for click here.

TEAM	PVS	RECORD	NSHL.com SAYS
1. Traders	3.	25-7-2	Must have traded their souls to the devil to be so good for so long. A perfect 10-0 in their last ten games played.
2. Muffs	2.	26-7-3	No short and curlies getting stuck in their teeth. Stingiest defense in the league and a powerful offense; it almost doesn't get any better.
3. Infantry	1.	23-9-2	Muskets loaded and ready to challenge for the Cup. All-around powerhouse that suffers by being in the same league as the Muffs.
4. Spirit	4.	19-12-3	Always soaring during the regular season, but could they be spooked again come playoff time? If they can get their offense to match their defense, watch for them to unseat one of the Big 3.
5. Loudmouths	5.	22-10-3	Finally putting their money where their mouth is. Fourth in points and a great run in their last 10.
6. Thieves	9.	19-9-6	Committing crimes all over the league. Great offense, which will help in this tight division race.
7. Thistles	8.	18-11-4	A thorn in the sides of many Nystrom teams. Leading the division in most goals for and least goals against.
8. Eagles	10.	17-9-7	Capable of soaring to the top of their division. Defense is decent, but their offense has paced them through a great last 10 games..
9. Foomanchu	6.	19-11-6	An ancient Chinese proverb says they could go far this year. Solid defense and 14 points in their last 10 games.
10. Stranglers	12.	15-14-4	Could put a hold on fourth place in their division if they continue to play like this. Slightly better than .500 with an offense just barely better than their defense.
11. Stompers	7.	15-14-2	Some improvement with the offense could see these guys walk right up to the top. Defense has let them down, but still better than .500, so I don't think they'll complain.
12. Psychosis	14.	12-15-6	They have kept themselves in the playoff hunt with some post-season subliminal suggestions. They don't have a chance to be better than fourth until they can get some offensive help.
13. Blades	15.	16-15-4	Will have to sharpen up if they want to compete in a tough division. Over .500 and out of the playoffs? Get some defensive help.
14. Booze Hounds	13.	14-15-6	Drinking their way to the bottom of the Cup. Too bad they won't be there to own it. Last place team in the division, but would make the playoffs in any other division.
15. Lizards	11.	14-18-1	Bunch of Geckos. Could set the record for the biggest collapse ever. Almost the worst offense in the league; maybe they shouldn't have sat their best players at the start of the season.
16. Ice Terrors	16.	11-18-5	Not very scary at all, but they play in a weak division. Will NEVER catch the Traders. Offense needs a major overhaul and their last 10 games have been terrible.
17. Fat Guys	17.	15-18-0	Take a lap, and then hit the showers, guys. The best thing that can be said is that they have never let overtime expire.
18. Crunch	19.	13-19-3	Making a lot of sucking noises this year; no real substance. Weak across the board, but finally played .500 hockey over 10 games.
19. Scorpions	20.	11-18-7	Has the sting of a Furby, but it could be enough in the Schultz. Fix the defense, they could be in 2nd; leave it and they could be in 6th. 3 points in their last 10 games.
20. Useless Twits	23.	9-23-1	Their opponents usually score more goals than these guys have IQ points. Totally useless. A minus-30 in goals for/against is killing them.
21. Buzzards	24.	7-20-5	Should be left alone in the desert to die. Worst defense in the league. They should try to match their 11th best offense.
22. SunDogs	17.	8-24-1	They say that every dog has his day, but I'll bet they didn't know about these guys. Worst offense; 2.5 goals per game. They should play soccer instead. (Editor's note: We think they have been!)
23. Highlanders	21.	6-24-5	These guys look more and more like Atlantians every day. Poor offense, poor defense, playing .200 hockey in their last 10. What else can you say? (Editor's note: At least they beat the SunDogs.)
24. Blazers	22.	9-23-4	Like a shooting star, these guys fizzle out before they could hurt anyone. They aren't the worst team in any category, but they are in the worst 5 in EVERY category except Power Play.